31st August11, Wednesday. Pretty much a good day at home. The best thing that we did for the 1st time was laundry - handwashing clothings together! While baby R soaks the clothings in the bubble basin, i rinse the tops with water... it made my tidious, hateful job seems more fun and i felt that we finished so fast!
Today for the 1st time, my mil actually told me that we should cook macaroni alphabets for baby R! GX had prob shared how difficult it was to feed baby R porridge for dinner, last week almost every other night, baby R skipped nap and slept thru dinner and only asked for milk... if she was awake enough, she refused porridge and GX had a tough nite trying to convince baby R to eat it... then this week mil had a go on Sunday and Monday nite to try to feed her porridge... she faced the same problem... but i told mil that for lunch we stil give porridge then only make the macaroni for nite.
Not sure if i will get it when i walked out of the room... cos i didnt cook macaroni last nite. Neither did i starve baby R... Gx was going to be late, stuck in meeting, so i had to get my own dinner... i got fried rice with sunny side-up egg and 2 chicken wings for dinner. Baby R wanted my rice and she had 2 bowls of rice with bits of egg and shredded chicken! so there wasnt anymore room for her to eat her macaroni! fingers X and hope the day start smoothly...
when i was about to change baby R into PJ, sil and bf came home and she dashed out of the room... i am particularly strict about bedtime on eve of class... called baby R several times and she didnt answer and unlike my family if they hear me calling baby R, they would send he message to her and ask baby R to go look for mummy... i was totally ignored... they were all too busy playing iphone games and sniggering... i went to the room and baby R hid under the blankey.... then she pops her head, see me and tell me BYEBYE MIMI....
boiled my blood and i demanded her to be back in the room now... when sil and bf sent her over, she rolled onto the floor and threw tantrum. I asked them to please leave the room and i started screaming at my gal! I told her what she did wrong of ignoring me calling her and not answering at all and i told her there is time for everything and i gave her enough time to mingle for awhile and whats important is she needs to sleep cos there is class tomolo... she cried and nodded her head and said sorry in her saddest tone and hugged me... i was too pissed to stop telling baby R off... i was frustrated how things are at home... mummy's call isnt important? i am sure sil didnt mean it but this happens alot more when pils are home...
my gal hugged me and sobbed and said sorry a few times to pacify me... i teared... i told her it would have been a good day if she had listen and answered me... spoke to daddy on the phone and baby R teared... she lie down to have her milk while i stroke her head and when she was done with milk, i gave her a massage to make her happier... didnt want her to go to sleep with negative feeling. she loves it when i blow on her tummy pretending she is a balloon. Baby R would say No mummy Stop but she would turn back and lift up her top so i can attack her before she turns away!
i wished i didnt need to have a shout down but i couldnt control myself... i was mad really MAD.
Did i ever want to be such a mum - NO... but somehow things didnt turn out as i thought it would be no use planning cos everything in the surrounding is a factor and nothing can be done to control the situation and make it happen the way i wanted it to be... i just hope baby R stays with me... i told her only when she listens to me, things would stay nice cos its frustrating that my gal doesnt listen and that makes me frustrated cos thing gets stuck. so much so for the last nite of August 2011
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