baby A turned 6 months old!

1st April 2012, Sunday. Bright and sunny through the day and I totally forgotten about the photoshoot i had in mind! When gx asked whats the day going to be like.... i told him its stay indoors to clear stuff... till i was reminded of the shoot when baby R chose to watch her photo videos that strike me!

Still i was happy i realised early... but we didnt get out of the house till almost 6+! coax baby R to nap but she didnt till i got her dressed up and with tied hair... she decided to nod off on the sofa! But lucky the sky stayed bright at Marine Barage even thou it was close to 7pm! Its always good to remember to talk to the kids of the plans esp with baby R! she has a mind of her own but given a plan she still tries to go with it! 

We had the shoot before play and it was tough but we pulled thru quick shoot and sadly it should be more pics of baby A cos its her "big day" but its tough cos we have such an active big sis who was eager to play... but i was sure baby A enjoyed her view on the mat esp having the sky view and exploring her toes! 

the day was almost ruined by baby R cos she was so impatient and wanted the kite string and not allowing daddy to put it up into sky as gx had wanted... she was also prob cranky from insufficient nap! lucky i brought the hug bubble stick to divert her attention when we wanted to skip kite flying cos there wasnt much wind to support flying it high too.... with the bubbles she wanted to grab it off me and i was so mad cos i was so afraid she poured the bubbles all out which she almost did when we had a tug and war before daddy stopped keeping the kite and came to my rescue.... 

glad her cranky moment was kept short and as night fell... baby A wasnt comfortable with the darkness... she cried and i urged daddy and baby R to stop... when we went downhill... i fell. i scrape my left knee and was just so glad baby A wasnt hurt! Somehow my right ankle twisted and i fell forward! so i do have something to remind me when baby A turn 6months old... a mark will prob stay on my left knee! When baby A was still in my tummy i had a fall too! that was on my right knee and so gx told me, it now even! one on the right and now one on the left! 

i spent the whole Monday cropping and erasing lots of people off our photos and yesterday and today making the video! i love the songs! when we were there... there was a group playing the ukulele! daddy's little gal definitely melted gx! this is video is a good start for me... sadly this is the first video i did for baby A! i hope i can continue with baby R's half-done 2nd year video and hope i can embark baby A's birth to 5 months old picture-video projects and also more videos of her till she turns one, hopefully all done up before she hit her 12months old!

missing in action

gosh my last blog was done 23Feb and the entry was for 8th Jan! i have uploaded lots of pics esp covering all cny celebrations but sadly today its already March16th! everyday i do log in but sadly i never got to open any of my pages to start typing... i was kinda lazy and busy at the same time... i was again at the GIVE IT UP stage.... i dun even load my pics as religiously every week! my camera cards are FULL thus i have sit here to download them...so what kept me busy?

2 kids. but i still have some time on com but i have been thinking of ideas for my new house. my gal's birthday celebrations, finding dresses for my sil's dec wedding for my gals and me. sourcing for my gals' educational stuff, daily wear and pretty wear... 

Sha asked me to type something jus type without pics cos she wants to read... thats why i am back!

Sha you kept me going.

Sadly as i wanted this new blog to capture new chapter in my life, as a mother to 2 kids... 2 kids = more laundry = more bottles = more attention needed to spread between 2 kids... = less time for myself and i do have to crack and seriously enjoy cracking my brains to create stuff... the thing that i can do and keeps me happy... i wish i could cook and bake like Sha! but now paper and pen is my best buddy!

checking in on FB and occasional chats with my friends is luxury! my window to the world

when gx told me he's at serangoon garden 2 nites ago, out for beer and work discussion... he say he pack supper for me... i told him to go village and i want my favourite holland V pizza thats has a branch there.. he asked how come i know theres one in this new building that i have never stepped into... cos i told him my friends check-in and i also travel all over the world with friends who updates travel albums...

talking about travels... i am so blessed... we got a postcard all the way from Santaland! Irene and hubby was so sweet to send my gals a postcard during their Finland trip! me and gx chomps on vodka chocs and also we were given a valhorna choc bar that i haven open... From Japan, M&A got our gals disney minnie mouse stuff! cute bib for baby A and a little hair bow for baby R! Yet to try the orange and honeydew kitkats! thats not all.... yesterday Dap popped by to see the gals and gave them each a cute wolly knitted hat from her taiwan trip! made the 2 gals very happy! Dap got baby A a pair of very cute socks and they arent any socks! they were Peter Rabbit socks! arent my gals lucky! i am so thankful to these people who had us in mind! THANK YOU SO MUCH! 

my last travel is really donkey years ago... gx goes on working trips every year... me dun even get time off from kids... gx say my wish came true... cos now i have my truly to myself a little gal who only wants mummy and nobody nobody but ME! to irritate me further, gx sang Nobody nobody but U! 

my baby A is a sticky glue to me! when i leave the house everyday to have my precious 15mins me time but this is spent walking or rushing to take train or bus to get to pick baby R up and some bonding time with baby R alone before hitting home total time 45mins... baby A would cry till her face turn red, deafen my mil's ears before sleeping when she knows i left her... but it got better cos if timing is right, i keep her awake all the way till i leave so she naps and give mil time to do chores while i am away... but with this March 1week school hols... i wonder if she would start her screaming cries again or calmly accept that i left the house... fingers X! 

i have so much to say... so much has happened... happy sad uplifting and down moments 

baby R has grown alot and baby A is 5months and counting! 

hopefully when baby A turns 6mths old next month which is actually in another 2weeks on April 1st... hopefully i can do an entry to describe my little chilli padi, my maltose, my little chubby chubby crybaby which i nickname Hum Baobao! Cantonese for CRY BABY but sounds like hamburger.

So i have a PiDan and a Hum Baobao! 

Gx clashes with Baby A cos she cried crazily in his arms and he raised his voice at her and that got baby A crying even louder and gx gave up being with baby A... they are still working out cos gx hates that she is so untouchable! on weekends... she clings on me and doesnt allow my mum to carry either! she is very different from baby R! baby R at least i have some rest for my shoulders now i have to rush thru dinners!  can't take my time cos when she cries... the moment i take over... then she stops if not its deafening! my mum say her lungs are so powerful! imagine!

i have not yet compile baby A's photos into montages and she has no videos at all! baby R's 2nd year i started but i have not opened it up to add on photos... time and hands .... no time no hands to do it! 

R is still maximising her Terrible 2... jus this week... gross but she has done terrible poopoo stuff in the toilet when i left her there alone to either handle baby A or occupied for jus that couple of minutes doing something while she should be sitted on the potty... thats how bad and i have started using free balloon sticks as cane... sadly no choice but to use that to control her behaviour cos she is so stubborn and PI!!!! told Dap i'm like stephen chow's kung fu movie Bao Zhu Po! sometimes she boils my blood till i shout at her - think my neighbours up and down a couple levels all know her name! Patience yes... i should be but try and be in my shoes and tell me if its possible! haiz... i want to be a nice mum but my gal knows how to push me to the edge! 

she is not all horrible... this gal is still a sweetheart... she is. we always make up by nites and there would be lots of hugs from her... nice words from this little one - prob 80% she means it, 10% is sometimes used to soften me so she dun get scolded cos sometimes when she chooses to tell me nice stuff its when she has done something wrong and 10% she is in a super good mood. so 100% she is clever!

in school she is doing well. according to the teacher, she catches on songs fast and teacher asked if i taught her all the songs she is taught in class and i said not all and that impressed both her english and chinese teacher! She also participates actively when teacher asked the class questions and i was told she is way too fast in answering every question that the teachers sometimes has to stop my gal and ask her to hold her answer first so that other kids can have a chance to think... gx is super happy to know baby R is doing well but i am pretty worried... i am not a KS mum who force my kiddo to absorb knowledge but my gal from young loves learning which is good but i wonder if i can keep up with her and wonder if her little friends will outcast her! kids nowadays are so smart unlike my days ... she is so friendly that other kids is afraid of her... 

so much to say... BUT

i need to end

need time to grab a peaceful bite while they are still sleeping... throw in their clothings for wash and hopefully able to load the pics and create space in camera and hp before the weekend... 

best thing baby R said to me one late afternoon when she woke up from her nap

Mum, i will take care of you and also take care of baobao... 

worse thing that happen so far for 2012.... bad news for my mum eyes... deteriorate with age and she now has to get use to having a dot in her vision... no laser or ops can help... the only thing i could do was to introduced bilberry juice to mum (ex-SAS col got some bad eye prob and told me before this helps...). Sure hope this helps... another sad news is my aunt is down with 2nd stage cancer... praying hard for her to recover and hope cancer stays far away from her.... haven heard exactly whats going to happen... gog to get baby R to give her prob a stalk of flower tomolo when we visit to cheer her on... 

Good things to look forward to : May we are suppose to get our KEYS to our very own house!

Gx and i had a talk one nite from 12mn to 3am on how we want our little 3rm house to be... its going to be simple and we arent hacking anything or spending $ on ID but we do have ideas on how we want the house to be! am pretty excited! clue : our kids will be happy! we are creating space for them! 

events in upcoming months

29th March marks 13years with GX.... he say that dun count liao lah = dun celebrate cos no $!

if i live to 70... i am half way there next month! 

in May baby R is going to celebrate her bdae a few days before school closes for June hols! she is very excited and i have lots to prep for it = thats what i have been busy planning but i will b busy preparing soon! 

then hopefully we can get our house ready by her 3rd bdae that happens to fall on Sunday to have relatives and some friends over to cheer for her and sure hope she drops the Terrible 2 trying stage and move on to be Terrific 3!

now i can just hope they nap on while i get things done and have a great weekend before baby R returns to school on Monday!

an extra xmas day

26th Dec11, Monday.

We took pils and the gals to taka to shop and the shopping trip was made rather short...

my cranky gal had made such a wooha that made the trip rather unpleasant...

in the evening, we had a mini xmas photo taking 

baby A's first xmas present from gugu and uncle R!

baby R loves the Hi5 Dvd she received very much!

then baby R decided to chomp up her gingerbread man!

later that nite, daddy and i gave our 2 gals the xmas bag of gifts we prepared!

baby A got a bib, a bag like the ones we got for my little cousins, a shape chart and a box of flashcards!

when baby R got the Oobi clothe bag, she put it over her head and told us she is Junior Master Chef!

Somehow, baby R kept asking me about the trumpet and i got this Playmonica for her!

thats all for xmas 2011!

Barney and Friends Show 2011

5th Dec12, Monday.

Got my gal to earn enough stickers to execute the plan of bringing her to see the barney and friends show on a Monday, grandparents arent working and daddy took off so that we have enough hands to handle 2 kids and the baby bags! to ensure that i get the chance for my gals to have a picture taken with the Barney, i left the house much earlier to first shop for the xmas presents and get the receipts and start queueing for the ticket for the photo taking! i was 5th in line and when my little family arrived with the grandparents, lucky they saw another queue forming and fil went to stand in line to get a place for our dear baby R to be able to have a seat in the show area!

mil suppose to be in the carpet area with baby R but somehow baby R freaked out over the loud sound system and wanted to get out and lucky she stayed in the area with daddy, if not waste fil's effort! baby R wanted me but i was sitting at the toastbox having my late brunch with baby A sleeping in my arms! the show was different from the previous year where it was solely barney and friends acting out xmas skit... this time round, it had different characters like Pingu the penguin, Sam fireman and lastly Barney... then the following week Bob the builder, Angelina ballerina and Thomas the train took the stage.

can you spot baby R?

*

Gx said that baby R wasnt really interested when Pingu and Sam fireman was on stage but once Barney appeared she stood staring at the stage, frozen and took awhile for her to move along with Barney! Mil helped to take one camera to video the show while gx accompanied baby R and fil & I walked about pushing the pram with our baby bags and me carrying baby A covering her ears when it got very loud and using my horrible low res hp i took shots of my gal from far!

tried so hard to get a shot of gx but i couldnt cos he was blocked by our dear little miss!

I felt that this year there were more people at the shows = CROWDED!

before the show ended, fil was already in line for the photo taking! while walking about we asked a security where the queue for the photo taking will be and fil was the 1st in line! thou we were all over the place, gx managed to see my hand sign and brought baby R to join fil and mil too was in time for the photo shoot while i queued a much behind so that baby R was in time to join in the line with us!

that day alone i spent $180 for my set of xmas gift and $300+ for mum's xmas gift for the kids thus i managed to get 2 tickets for photo taking! its baby A's 1st show photo taking and she slept thru the queue for ticket, show and photo taking! its also baby R's 1st photo with Barney! Last year we only saw the show twice but didnt take any photos with Barney!

after the show, we head to KK for baby R's appointment to check on the scars... 

she was stuck playing at this toy house and my mil told her she would buy one for her! 

thanks to Popo who got me to help her get the xmas gifts... i accumulated enough receipts to redeem this beautiful umbrella and also a calendar filled with all the characters from the show! baby R loves umbrellas and of cos she was thrilled to see this new addition to our cute umbrella collection! the following week my inlaws brought baby R to see the 2nd set of the show but no pics cos the camera had no battery and also mil said baby R didnt want to be in the area and she rather go find the "character rides" than stay around to watch the show... i stayed home with baby A cos without the car its difficult and the sky was grey... although we have a beautiful umbrella to use, we rather not take the risk.

i want to make you smile

8th Dec10, Thursday nite, baby R told me these words and i felt so tired. yes thats how i felt... yesterday was a good day... baby R was better behaved than other days... i shouted less cos she did less rascal stuff to boil my blood... she even helped me thru when i clean up baby in the evening... it was a good day considering the moment i had with her was mostly smiles... my poor gal is getting independent in playing on her own, pretending to read to her toys... 

when i put baby R to bed, its still a struggle... to be exact an hour of struggle and now its getting worse as i need the time to set up more bottles for the nite, by the time i get to bed its already 10.30pm to 11pm... so her sharp ears hears all the voices in the living room, pils home past 11pm... its a tough struggle to keep baby R on the bed... 2 days ago, she even resort to pat me to sleep so she can quietly pass me, head for the door and get her way... but i didnt fall for it cos i was struggling to keep myself awake for baby A's feeding time... when one sleeps, the other takes up the slot and if i am lucky, baby A sleeps thru till 1 or 2am... but thats another struggle i face alone... nite duties all done solely by myself cos by the time gx gets to bed its about 2am... sometimes he is still working, he helps with the  bottles or he chills out with his games and catches up with the news via com.... 

seriously its tough on my own thru the day with 2 kids... both needs my attention and poor baby R has to share her time with baby A who keeps me on the toes cos she constantly needs me... after drinking milk, she needs to be burped or she refuse to lie down and end up i have to carry her in my arms restricting me doing things with baby R... then when she is down in her cot, i have to wash the bottles, fix the bottles, catch my bite drink up before baby A wakes up... for a nappy change then milk feed and the cycle runs again... i have about an hour the most so far to do things with baby R.... craft work thats rushed thru, her homework and some quick cuddling... 

i felt so tired when baby R told me she wants to make me smile .... cos maybe she misses my smile... she knows i am upset with her fall that left the mark on her nose bridge and eyebrow... but she still runs about the house, climbs everywhere, jump about and off... = constant fear in me and constant shout out to stop her... i am tired but i have to pull thru thou body aches, the lump on my thumb suddenly hurts and its got bigger... thou i have support from mil and gx... i feel pretty much alone and sadly... gx is stuck at work and he prob wish to be around but yet also he finds it hard not to shut his eyes on his kids when he lies on the bed... i think baby R misses his stories before bedtime alot... cos we hardly have him around on weekday nites... baby A also doesnt get much of my attention cos i am always aim to make her nap and when her eyes are open wide at me, i hardly chat with her cos i have to keep an eye on baby R... 

i need to smile for my gals... i sure hope this phrase will pass and i get better control of things with my 2 gals... for people who have help as in maids... dun tell me not to shout... try it out for 2 months and counting with an active kid and 2 hourly fed baby .... with no help to wash the numerous bottles needed thru the day and doing nite rounds solely by oneself, then talk to me... i am so tired to be told off by my mum to talk to baby R nicely ( when she is rascal = boils my blood immediately!) be like my aunts... sorry to say... i am really solely on my own... thus i bear all the pain to carry my own baby bag, baby in my arm all the way, facing my hubby who is trying very hard to hold our active on in hand... to enjoy being out of monday-friday haunt... thanks to my aunt A and SI group who gave us vouchers.... i got to do some shopping for baby A and i am looking forward to hit taka to get stuff for our family after xmas... preparing ourselves for cny... tired but its better to have something to look forward to... 

tomolo baby R will be flowergal for the first time... no idea if she will freak out or do her walk perfectly... its hard to tell what my little 2 years old will do.... of cos i hope she can do it if not i had warn my cousin about it! dinner would be tough cos with baby A in hand... wonder if she will be good thru... fingers X! i still haven got to try my dresses and decide which to wear... when i consulted baby R before she napped... she said to me - BLACK would be Good! wow... thats what my gal told me!

next Sunday -  gx's fren's wedding luncheon, then we go over to my uncle's surprise bdae party and followed by gift exchange for kids cos my aunt O is gog for hols. then the following week we have turkey for xmas at my aunt A's new place... shopping the next day and following week would be 2012 New Year... isnt it fast? Cny is also in January! will this be my last entry for the year? why no pics posted? cos we yet to get my new external drive! 

both gals napping... i have a very tired body and heavy heart... i need to pour out before i can take my super achy shoulders to the kitchen to wash up the bottle and fix those in the steriliser! the cycle goes on! 

Just in case this is the last you hear from me, esp for my dear frens - the ones i know who reads my blog for sure Shanice - hope you are feeling warm with Toto and hubby this xmas in your far far away white wonderland, Irene - your biggest xmas present is prob spending time with your hubby in your newly renovated house : BIG congrats! Dap -  so want to hug you my dear fren and hope you enjoy your xmas and shopping... to the rest of my frens, have a great time with your family and friends and Merry Christmas!

Getting better....

Haven updated since drama on Saturday nite.... Gx came home almost 2-3am... His fren is going back to work in China, thus he really need to meet up... but really mean me hopes his fren doesnt pop by too soon... haiz bad terrible me... but i am sure he lent my hubby a listening ear... anyway, Gx came home that wee morning, he took some time before he came into the room, he spoke to mil and told her i wanted to feed as much as i can breastmilk... also my mil told gx that she was jus very worried about the baby... and also she was worried i am too stressed out by the progress... i was relieved to hear that and gx helped me massage to make the engorgement go away and it helped... 

Sunday was a busy day. We received a call from the hospital that baby A was down to 5.2... she can come home! Gx and i went to get her and she opened both her eyes wide to look at us! then the little one got herself comfortable and slept in our arms thru the car ride and my shopping spree at KK. Yes, after tmc, wee head to KK. i came here mainly to shop! jus before gx came home, i called TMC 24hours hotline and the nurse advised me to put cabbage over the breast to ease the sore nipple... then apply cream which i haven gotten. TMC shops doesnt open on the Sundays, so i woke up asked on FB advise on breastfeeding and i appreciate the milkmaids that gave me precious advices and encouragements! 

From The First Few Years, i got a new brand Lansinoh cream for the sore nipple, got Nipple Nurture cleansing pads which smells so good and i feel cleaner after wipes before pumping... (till now, i haven shower for the last 11days! tomolo i will get my good cleanup finally!) Also i got another padded bra from Mothercare cos the recommended OIO, angie recommended wasnt opened... at the cashier i got baby R a gift i know that she would be very thrilled to get... got to sis' place to pick up the mattress and i was out almost for a couple of hours!

It was a relief feeling to have baby A home! Thru the afternoon, i sat up to clear all the clothings into where it goes cos i am the only one who can arrange it and we set up the bathing station with all the things needed and i love the bathing station providing us space for keeping things needed for baby's clothing and bathing changes... got all the baby cot fittings all into the cupboard... got myself organised how i wanted my breastfeeding stuff like wipes, med, disposable nursing pads, pumps... then jus in time when i was done, help arrived! 

1st paeD visit

baby A is still in the hospital today... her jaudice level dropped to 11.2... only when its below 10 then she can come home... yesterday was her 1st visit to paed... looking yellow i know she needs to be sun further but never expect to be warded... had to send her in makes me worried... but at the same time making the decision to come bac to dr. Ong was great for me cos he sure have ways with kids and he mananged to distract my clever gal who kept trying to get up to see wats he doing, got nurse to hold her legs n daddy help w the arms cos she tried to struggle, Dr Ong jab baby R fast and baby R had no time to react as she wanted to cry out loud, gx n i haven even got chance to comfort her, out of no where we saw bubbles n thou baby R didnt look excited she didnt get a chance to cry n she was immediately given a packet of 2pcs animal cookies n thats it!

then we sent baby A to draw blood for the test n i hated the mt A nurse! she say no comfort words to the baby n she jus jab my gal's ankle n baby A jus cry n she jus grabs her leg to draw the blood she needed with her no-smile face n look so sickening! couldnt brg myself to tell her off cos i afraid she hurt my baby... argh! had lunch then waited to be called bac to clinic... then we were told our option to rent a home machine or send baby bac to hospital... thou more ex we head bac to tmc, which we think its a better choice...

in the afternoon, when we admitted her to her ward where the room was filled with bluelight boxes, there were 3 other babies, one of them was gx's ex-saf col's son who we met while waiting to do registration... his son was diagnose 12+. by night when gx sent the milk for baby A there were more parents n seems all waiting to talk to the nurse... gx spoke to a dad who''s child was 13+, saying there wasnt much sun for their baby n his PD the sun rays werent strong enough either... that explains for the many babies that return to tmc for treatment...

today baby A is 1 week old... but she is still staying in the hospital today... after this expressing, i gog to clean up, head for gynae appt then pop by to see my little one... here are some pics of her 6 days old jus before she got admitted in... daddy was fascinated with how her hair swirls! hope she can discharge tomolo...

last night i got the chance to do the normal sleep routine with baby R... cos she needed to go for her new shichida class... also normal cos baby A isnt around to poo, cry and needed my attention... and breaks my time with setting baby R... can see my gal was comfortably getting herself ready for story in bed and half way reading her new book i awarded her... baby R stopped me and told me... "today. doc take PENCIL poke me... Painful!"

I looked at baby R and couldnt helped but laughed... i told her that was a jab, an injection was given to her and doc didnt use a pencil to poke her... told her if she wanted to go to school, she has to be strong and to be given a jab to be strong... she then asked me to continue reading... off all the lights, i held her hand and i think i must have slept first... cos i dun remember checking on baby R.... daddy came home from his work/drink session at 3+am and i woke up to express... can't help thinking of my little cinnamon donut... my little baby A... couldnt sleep till 4.30am... wondering if my baby A is doing well... she has been awake in the nite... so i wonder is she is crying for attention and if she is soothed to sleep... miss her badly.

melting

The heat is melting me! Thou i am observing the no shower rule, i am allowed to do a hot water-towel clean down and i need it but after the short moment of comfort, after a hot bowl of soup and a hot horlick to replenish and encourage better milk flow, i am all hot and perspiring! 

Also the meals i have been eating is filled with ginger lots of the good heat to chase away the wind in the body! all the good brews of soup mum makes for quantity milk flow, to purify my blood, dishes to warm my stomach and body, warms me up and make me feel good, even thou i feel like i am melting away with the heat ....

But last nite, sleeping was a big problem again... baby A slept and baby R kept getting off the bed to want to see her sister but she was making so much noise, baby A cries... so daddy and i took turns to be in the room but somehow jus as when baby R is near to dozing off, one of us sure to open the door and she bounces up from her pillow immediately... and she smiles at us when the lights are switched on... WHY? cos baby A had poopoo and needed to be cleaned up immediately... when gx tot baby A finally is settled... he left her in the cot and i was with baby R... the only thing he never expected was to hear me shout. i was frustrated the moment gx left the room, baby R sat up, got up as quick as lightning... got over me and made noises to wake her little sis up... and sure baby A woke up crying so loud! I shouted at baby R and ask her to make meimei stop crying herself... i asked to see meimei's face... asking baby R if she liked meimei crying so hard! 

baby R felt guilty and gx came in to take Baby A out of the room and i continued to tell baby R off in my prob loudest frustrated tone! Got her in bed and i kept biting on the issue she is having, not sleeping when told to do so and disturbing meimei, making meimei cry ... baby r rolled over to hug me and kiss me and i was still at the melted point where i didnt let the issue pass and i told her off for her terrible behaviour.... till gx had to come into the room to stop me... telling me the whole house can hear my voice... thats the indication someone's prob pissed with me... 

baby R and i were left in the room and i calmed down, talked to her and told her i tried to talk to her in the nice tone, so listen and do as i told her and things won't end up that i needed to shout at her to make her understand that mummy's tired and in pain, daddy's not well and meimei need rest and so does herself... i told her mummy tried to massage her to spend time on the bed with her but getting up and rolling all over and accidentally hurting my wound makes me very mad... and in the end everyone's not happy... i held and massage baby R's hand to sleep....

Told Gx i had to give baby R one time the Hard way of lecture so that we can handle better nites ahead without her having to challenge us cos next week, he will be back to work and having so many days off, i am  pretty sure he will be tight down with work up to his neck to come home early... and to face this situation day after day... what had to be stop had to be done... i am also not sure when my inlaws will be back to work cos they are playing an important role to support me by helping to take over baby R's routine.... thou it  isnt the way i do it and we end up having in bed at almost 11pm and usual baby R's sleeping rule is she take an hour to get to lala land.... but we have not much choice cos of baby A's unexpected poos and cries... hope things will turn better... 

Fil came into the room to tell me not to shout at the gal last nite... this morning, mil tell me how baby R misses us when we were away... 

this morning, my gal woke up next to me, smiling. as usual jus like any other weeks, any other days before baby A came along, i told baby R : I love your smiles in the morning... Last nite after baby R slept, i used the Shicida method, talked to my gal apologising to her that i had to resort to shouting at her but i needed her to understand and help me thru... and i told her How much i love her and that she will always have a special place in my heart and that will always be hers and baby A will dig her own hole in my heart and fill it up... We had a good conversation and we laughed, kissed and hugged. Daddy joined in and we had a great start to our morning. 

After baby R slept, we slept till baby A woke up for a feed and i tried to latched her on again and it worked!  i managed to get her fed and while burping her, i spoke to baby A too... telling her how much daddy and mummy loved her and we know she wants us to know her needs and she wants us to get things done for her but i said to her she need to stop crying so hard cos we feel the pain to see her turn so red and it slows us down when we try to be fast...cos we get so worried... Today, she still cried but it wasnt like constant like before... she did managed to stop and we got to work as fast as could to make her comfortable... of cos there are still moments that she cry thru but i was glad at least she cried lesser today! 

today is suppose to be the day i give birth ... its sure a hot day but my body had a weird reaction when the wind blew at me... i felt cold thru my body and aches... the cold send chills thru my body! so i did lie down to rest, hiding under the blanket and melting under the heat but i felt cold... and hot... now its raining heavily... sure hope the aches in my body dun get worse... esp the shoulders cos i get very tired after pumping or latching my baby ... cried thru this post esp the part where i typed about baby R... sure hope some decisions can be left to me ... not gx... cos somehow i hate it he consults his mum before me at times and this makes things so difficult when his mum thinks his idea is workable... thats another melt down i have today... hope we can solve it... 

Discharged and Charging

Everything is good and we settled payment, got our things packed and ready to go.... SHoPPing! The lactation consultant who came by to see me earlier that day, i think she is 2nd to Mrs Wong who is the head of the parentcraft centre! Even if she is not 2nd in charge, she is very experience and very motherly! Her name is lilian and she told me she remember seeing me before and when i told her i was attending her prep talk for new parents from the wards to attend, i was in her class 2 years ago. My problem was i didnt have the right size for my bra and it isnt giving me the support i needed and the milk veins? not sure the term to use are kinda block up and lumps making my breast very hard... so she massaged with pressure on my chest and i had to breathe in and out to ease the pain! but after she did it and taught me how to massage, the next thing she told me is to get a bigger and better support bra. So directly from TMC we head United Sq to get the Medela pump parts that we needed to replace and got new bras. then we popped by sis' place to picked up the dishes mum prep for my lunch!

Once home, i had to practice the massage cos it was still painful and latching baby A on was tough... then when baby A managed to sleep, i took some time to see my gal and really baby R isnt baby anymore... suddenly a day not seeing her at all, she didnt come by on the eve cos mil and i agreed that she should try to nap in the afternoon and to be prepared to receive her lit sis with better sleep... baby R seems so big gal suddenly! she looked taller, bigger in size and somehow more sensible when she is in the mood and of cos she did throw tantrum here and there , very eager to be part of what we were doing with baby A... getting in the way all the time... poor gal jus trying very hard to be a good sister cos she is told Not to touch her feet, not to stand over the cot to see baby A.... hard to balance it out at times but we have to tell her there are certain things she can't do!

Glad the books i ordered are here! i gave baby R her 1st book to reward her for being a good sister! Her favourite story she watches on the dvd - Harod and his purple crayon! Baby R eyes' beamed in delight to receive the book and she gave me a kiss on my lips to thank me. the down part of the whole day is Gx! Once home, we had to unpack the bags and cos we werent really ready before baby A came cos we were suppose to have the weekends to tie up the loose ends and i had another 3 weekdays to work things out... everything changed and we had so much to do... cos we needed to adjust things in the room to create space for more things.... GX was mean when i can't recall where the things he was asking for were... when i remembered wrongly he was mad at me and i got really pissed i walked out of the room!

My mil calmed me down and she went to tell Gx to do the same and i was so upset esp when mum called to see how we were doing... i teared. so fed up with Gx who seriously has more rest than i did in the hospital cos once i breastfeed at 4am i am kind of awake and its difficult for me to get back into sleep mode... i did calm down and packed the things out of the bags instead of being in the same room as him... didnt want to make things worse cos baby A cries pretty loud to inform us her needs... we did talked nicely to each other...

Coming to baby A... She is loud! she sure hops like a bunny! Joking! but when we placed her to change her soiled diaper, she cries till her face is red and she is loud! she moves further and further up from where she was place thats why i said she hops! Tried to feed her latched on and she was causing me pain but i didnt want her to cry further so i bear with the pain... Jiejie was so sweet to Jiayou for her little sis!

I had an earlier snack-dinner cos i was really hungry i had mum's black vinegar pig trotters with some rice! I simply love mum's pig trotters! was glad mum got this prep cos i was so hungry and this was superb! Mum was suppose to pop by with later dinner but i got gx to go over to sis' place instead to take the shower trolley! so i didnt get to see mum at all but i didnt want her to take the trouble to travel to and fro...

when fil and gx came home with packet dinner and my homecooked delights from mum, i told gx to have his fill first. He was so smart not to packet his dinner cos knowing my mum would prep too much and i wot be able to finish... i stayed in the room to rest while baby A was in her cot sleeping... then i heard baby R's voice very loudly she exclaimed :

I must take care of Mimi! I need to ask her to take dinner!

i sat up on the bed and the door opened, seeing my dear baby R coming towards me, i teared. daddy followed baby R and said I knew you sure cry one! he wanted to make sure i know what baby R said... Gx told baby R to let me rest first and took her out but baby R kept running back to check to see if i was doing fine in the room and of cos she checked on her baby sis too!

When i had dinner, baby R kept coming to see how i am still... we didnt managed to get baby R to bed at her usual time cos gx and i were busy cleaning baby A up for the 1st time on our own without the nurses... baby A poo quite a few times thru the afternoon till nite and when i told mum this morning, she told us its becos baby A is on breastmilk which is easy for baby to digest thus more poo! Mum is sure an expert after staying with baby nephew L who's fully on breastmilk!

it was tough to put our 2 gals in the same room at the same time trying to make them sleep! baby R is now used to sleep in the dark and only in the dark she would behave and get restless cos she can't see a thing and if we ignore and pretend to be sleeping, baby R would eventually rest for the nite... but on the other hand, baby A is used to the lights in the nursery! she comes into the hospital room i also have to on the lights to feed her if not she would struggle and will cry if the lights werent on! So i told gx to take baby R and make her sleep while i carried baby A out in the living room to sway her to sleep...

walked back to the pitched dark room... i heard snores... when my eyes adjusted to the darkness, i see a hand waving... i switched on the lights and i see baby R sitting up waving at me while daddy was snoring away! so i changed with daddy, i took over in the room and managed to make baby R close her eyes and that was almost 12mn... and i somehow slept too and only when gx came into the room with baby A... i woke up to do my next expressing...

The expressed milk came in handy cos gx helped me feed baby A while i could continue to rest for the nite... i am thankful to gx who helped me out even thou his temper and tone was sickening... he still tried his best to support me...

Today we charged on, starting the morning with sunning baby A cos she has jaudice. baby R was wondering what we were doing and after we explained to her, i asked daddy to help take a pic but instead, baby R went to take the camera with mil's help and both of them took a shot for baby A and me! Gx and i were working as fast as we could with changing baby A... cos once she starts crying, she wont stop till she is completely cleaned up and swaddled! It was also easy to guess whats upsetting her so much... after knowing the facts that breastfed babies poo much more!

Today Daddy and Mummy bath baby A for the 1st time, she started crying and daddy said beside not liking her soiled diapers, baby A doesnt like it when she doesnt have clothes on! But once we got her into the water, she was all calm and enjoyed the splashes... but once out of the tub! Charged went gx and i!

today as a reward and to cheer baby R, trying to show her my attention, i got her to put on the fluffy purple skirt mil got for her and i got her to pose for me to catch some shots! she was happy being a little ballerina posing and jumping high for me to snap away! Received my parcel of sock and clothings i ordered before giving birth... showed baby R the socks i bought for her to wear to school and there were 3 pairs for her to use when she sleeps... she loved it and gave me a kiss on my lips to thank me on her own! but this little cranky gal didnt want to nap and got herself so tired before she doze off...

on the hand i have been expressing milk thru the day and haven latched baby on at all... hope this works cos its actually NO pain for me and faster way to satisfy her hunger without struggle but gx was worried about the flow... not being fed as many times in the hosital, i actually drank less and not constantly... whenever i can drink, i drink alot at one shot... not sure if this affects the volume of the milk... will have to ask for help if volume doesnt increase... cos baby's now taking 30-40ml but in time to come she would need more!

I know i should be resting... but somehow, i really want bits and pieces of my day to be recorded! loaded the pics as i typed but i am running out of time to load them up... will try my best to so something... but to me text now is the best memories cos pics i can always post but cracking my brains to remember days of activities = IMPOSSIBLE! so i hope to be able to keep up with my updates as much as possible!

had porkchops, potato and gingery orange tangy fish fillet for lunch.... mum said she would pop by earlier with my dinner and i can't wait to see her and of cos have my yummy dinner... feels so good to be pampered by my mum... her cooking is precious esp at this point of my life... mum did so much for me... so did my mil...

my mil showered my with support, helping me with the clear up and with our things like the hampers baskets taking over the coffeetable she told me to leave those till we are free to clear them... she didnt mind at all the whole living room in a mess filled with our things... she had to wait till baby R slept in the nite, she started doing her laundry.... Also my sil purposely took a day off from work to stay home to help look after baby R and help my mil watch baby R while she does some cleaning up in the house before we returned! I appreciate all the help at home... i am very blessed...

i gota go prep myself a cup of hot red date tea my mum brewed and drink up all the rest of the fish & papaya soup and go express my next round of milk for baby A before she wakes up... Gx is napping with baby R now and he needs to recharge for the nite duty... i am very thankful.

engorged

Last nite after i was done with the entry, mum popped by to bringus after-dinner snack... my poor mum isnt feeling very well but she cooked meesua for us, gx and me. the smell of the soup filled my room and the warmth of the bowl of the homemade snack - fish and kidney messua was very yummy... gx enjoyed this bowl of meesua watching the ending of Sister Keeper... which i tried not to watch... taking peeks at time but i didnt want to cry or feel sad so i tried not to watch...

after the meesua, i wasnt done... mum still had another bowl of soup for me. She had specially brewed it for me once she left the hospital, hit home, she worked on my next meal. i am very thankful to my mum and her love, concern, worried about my health, providing me the best so i can recover well thru the food she prepares for me.

Gx was suppose to send her home then head back with all the basket of chicken essense and birdnest we received thru the day... but the nurse pushed the baby in and mum didnt want me without support in the room and she sneaked away... taking cab on her own... baby did latched on well but when i changed sides, she went on it for awhile and broke into a super loud cry! We got the nurse to settle her cos she won't try again and won't stop crying... This little one, doesnt like it dark in the room but lights were on... She doesnt like the room too cold... but she was in for quite awhile... She doesnt like to be in soiled diapers at all - so that could be the reason!

So when baby went back to the nursery to be under the blue lighting... gx head home to see our baby R and to unload stuff.... called home at 10.30pm, baby R said she was eating pear... i told her no fruits at such late hours... cos i didnt want her to have tummy ache! Told her to sleep early cos i will be heading home tomolo and she said Yes mimi... She used to shout Yes mimi but since baby A came along she mellowed down to hear what i say to her... miss seeing her cheerful face but not the rascal behaviour... fingers X!

I was glad i managed to get Gx before he left the house cos i was lying in bed in pain! my breasts felt so engorged and i told him no way i can wait till getting home to express the milk! still i couldnt wait for him to be bac in the hospital, i called for the nurse. She suggested lending me the electric pump they have to express the milk to relieve my pain... i was so relieved to hear that. Gx came in and was surprise to see me expressing and baby came in not after him. so i fed baby A the side i hadnt express and then instead of latching her the other side, the nurse helped me feed her with the milk i had jus expressed.

Got another empty bottle from the nurses cos i was still so engorged and i managed to pump out another 30ml after the 25ml i first gave the nurse! still i feel so hard after expressing that i arranged with the nurse that i want to see the lactation consultant before i leave the hospital! i had difficulty sleeping cos the breast felt so hard still and painful. woke up a couple of time thou baby was going be fed with the milk i expressed... couldnt help worrying if she had enough and by 4am+ woken up by the heavy downpour, feeling so engorged, i pressed the bell for the nurse and the bottle came for me to express and i managed to express another 30ml, feeling relieved for awhile and then again so painful and the breast felt so hard i couldnt lie down cos somehow lying down made it really unbearable.... so i started typing.

Happy i have better milkflow than my 1st round but i am now worried if i had expressed too late and leading to some problems of engorgement... sure hope jaudice is reduced and baby can head home with us... also before we head home later, it was good gx brought the pumps here cos last nite i got a container from the nurse that we need to pay for and also a box of tablets to sterlise the pumps that hadnt been used for 2 years... then we realise the shield for pump i used isnt good and need a replacement! the pump we bought over from my fren B was much newer thou it was 1 or 2 years older than my set cos she hardly used it and she got herself a dual pump and i was glad to be the owner of her single pump to make my a pair now!

hope the consultation will solve me engorged problem... gog home soon in another few hours... told the nurses that came in thru the night and jus this wee morning, the many thanks i had to express to them cos they are all so sweet... so calm, so willing to do their part to make our stay comfortable and so pampered with their help. I need to be grateful to Gx for allowing me to have such treatment after giving birth staying on the level 5 premium single like before even thou he now shoulders the payment fully by himself... for this level we had to top up more and also its charging alittle more than 2 years ago... not sure of the nurses on other level but seeing some familiar nurses we had 2 years ago and some remembered us and also new nurses, i am grateful to all the help we were given. told the nurses they will be badly missed the moment i step out of the hospital...

baby A's Day2 and 3

My first batch of friends visitors Ser and ET popped by to see baby A and me! My primary schoolmates were thrilled to baby A! They said she look very sweet! i started calling baby A Sweet Pea since i first breastfeed her cos i had a very good look at her then! Baby R was more like a cheerful baby and i called her Little Anpan then cos she looked so much like a cute little red bean bun and her little sis more like a cinnamon donut!

My friends were so sweet to shower me with a flower bouquet that came with a stand, baby A with a pink pokkadotted box of 5 pieces of beautiful baby rompers and dresses and they even prep a gift to cheer baby R, a purple giraffe with colourful dots! Thank you so much to my 2Gfs for being sooooo nice to me and my gals! appreciate your kindness!

Not long we received the next message for our room number and my 2 friends from SI were popping by to see us! but before they came by, my uncle K, aunt M and twins and Aunt S came by to the new addition to the family! Aunt M was kind to help me get the covered dish dryer for me cos the day before after we talked about the cupcakes for the party, i asked her where she gotten hers cos i couldnt find it... Aunt M remembered and purposely helped me get... so blessed to have so much help! Mum came by with homecooked gingery and peppery lunch for me... mum served it right up even thou i jus had finished my lunch not very long ago...

My gal shares the same bdae as her 2 yiyis, my twin cousins!

Before uncle K's family left, gx had already gone home to settle the cot. He had wanted to set up the cot on Sunday jus that he was expecting baby A to come the following Thursday and not arrived before he dragged the cot out... but i was lucky to have most of baby A's things done... jus that the slide for baby R's 2nd year photos is not completed yet, i was half way thru it!

I was about to finish my mum's bak kut soup, fried cod and liver in ginger with rice (simply love mum's cooking!) my gfs came. Penny's whole family turned up with Angie and daughter to visit us! The 2 ladies send their gals to the same ballet class. The gals were asking for baby R cos they got her a balloon and i was given chicken essence... but Gx told me our gal was alittle jealous and insisted in getting into the cot when it was setup... baby A was in the nursery cos she was going to take her bcg jab. The kids enjoyed the mini lollypops and i got teased for having time to do the little basket for the lollypops!

Angie asked why i had so many spelling mistakes on the blog entries... cos here the system is slow and i jus keep typing and i dun check cos i get terrible aches in m shoulder and back after typing those entires lying down cos i was only allowed and was off my bed for the 1st time yesterday evening! to me i really want to keep an update of what happens everyday if possible so i use all my energy and time i have to type as fast and thus to me spelling mistakes thats comes with speed typing and no seeing the letters appear as i type, it is not something i can care about now!

the ladies stayed and we chatted about my experience, their memories of their kids and they needed to leave to bring the kids to ballet... then when it was all quiet, the nurse came to help me change and i got off the bed without GX around. this time round i managed to sit up on the bed slowly with the help of the nurse, then one leg at a time off the bed and i stood up with the nurse holding me and i managed to walk to the toilet on my own, very slowly... after the nurse left, i was very tired. Since i got off the bed i sat on the chair but i started dozing off! So mum told me to take my teatime and then lie down and i did... i was exhausted, finally i slept deeply...

When i woke up, mum gave me a cleanup and heated up the food and soup for me. My inlaws and sil+bf and of cos my little baby R came... suddenly looking at baby R she look so much bigger in size and she sure look like a big sister. baby R was all over the room! Can sense she is alittle jealous but she was so sweet still to come touch and sayang me, gave me a kiss and hugged me. When she saw Alicia, baby R wanted to sayang meimei but she would run away after awhile.

Watching my gal being a rascal... got me alittle worked up... esp when she accidentally pressed on my wound... i need to watch my tone... jus hope she show more love to the newborn baby sis and grandparents who i appreciate their help looking after her at home won't spoil her, change too many rules... They managed to get her normal time 11pm yesterday... but baby R woke up this mporning at 8am... today she is going to stay at home to have a normal day before baby A and mummy goes home tomolo!

after everyone went home, i was so tired i jus lie down watch news and some tv till 11pm... i slept till baby came in at 3am+. Thru the day, baby A didnt latched on as well and this morning i requested for the lactation consultant. She came in jus in time jus now to help me out and she taught baby A how to do it nicely. baby A has jaudice and today she spend less time in the room with us cos she needs to be under the blue light... After GX picked up the "breastfriend pillow" the lactation lady came back to give me and baby another round of help and gosh its so much better and baby A did well!

After we received our 1st delivery gift from Gx's contractor and followed after mum and sis with nephew popped by and i had my 2nd round of lunch! love my lambchops i had for lunch from tcm, one craving down! so mum's lunch was more confinement esp the black soup she brewed today! tangy and alit bitter but after drinking, i felt very refreshed! mum said the soup is for replenishing blood.

Gx's collegues and boss came with a huge basket of birdnest and chicken essence after they left, Gx's friend Janice popped by to visit us and she came with a white basket of birdnest and chicken essence! Cousin A came to visit me with a pretty chocolate bouquet but not long gx and i left for class and i almost suffocate in the small room filled with parents so hot and some mummies were in thick sweaters and shawls! i couldnt sit thru the whole class after the refreshment course on how to clean the baby, i skipped the breastfeeding portion! The nurse said those on level 5 can access the video on the com! GREAT .... i was happy to breathe out of the room!

When i was buying delifrance for midnite wee morning snack... i spotted my 2 aunts, Aunt O and Aunt K. They told me they waited in the room for us for an hour and they had seen the baby cos they asked the nurse and they were ready to leave to go back to supervise my cousins who will be having exams soon... of ocs the little ones wanted to come see their new niece... but they have to wait till exams are over before they get to see baby A!

When we were back in the room, i started taking pics of the baskets of health products we received... and i spotted another white basket of birdnest fr Aunt A and another brown medium basket of birdnest from Aunt O! the funny thing was the basket from Gx's office and aunt O had the same ribbon... gx's boss is my uncle! so we laugh and say how the hubby and wife had the same taste! the basket from gx's friend J and aunt K got the same white basket and i loved it! esp one is a little smaller and one bigger cos i can see myself using them for parties!

this entry started in the morning, took time to feed baby, eat my meals, received my guests, nurses inserting med... jus had dinner and trying to finish this entry! We have the go ahead to go home tomolo... jus hope baby A who is now still receiving her bluelight treatment will be jaudice free to go home with us... dun think i be free tomolo to update... wonder how many days we take to settle down...

baby R was in baby A's cot... i called home to tell her not to get in anymore... she wasnt stopped... but i had to tell her to and tell her how she can't get into Didi L's cot and it goes the same for baby A... i HAD to WARN my gal that if i see her in the cot i would smack her... SAD RIGHT.... hearing from mummy... not a very nice piece of thing to say either... i explained to her she is too big and heavy for the cot and baby A doesnt have other place to sleep cos she is too small to sleep on my bed and i asked if baby A could sleep on baby R's bed, baby R replied no... i told her if she is good gal, i will reward her... she asked me for sticker and in addition i told her i would give her a surprise if she behaved and leave the cot for meimei, she said YES Mimi... i wished i hadnt need to give her the stick 1st... if only she wasnt allowed in the 1st place... haiz... but i appreciate the help we are getting at home with our gal... jus hope everything works out fine when we bring baby A home tomolo.